I know March is over, but I had hoped to document some of the adventures we have had in 13 years of marriage. I hope my kids will enjoy reading them and gain insight one day.
Just like we planned adventures for our anniversary, we have had many adventures in our marriage. I have found most adventures are not planned, and if they are, they rarely turn out as you imagine they would.
Of all the adventures we have had, I would say becoming parents has been both the most challenging and rewarding thing we have done.
We knew when we got married we wanted three, possibly four children. We also thought it was important to have my college done, and have some sort of passive income coming in. Those were our goals.
Two months after my college graduation, we decided to start our family. Deryn arrived before we even had time to reconsider -within a month we were pregnant!
My pregnancy with Deryn was normal until about 7 months. At that time I was placed on bed rest with pregnancy induced hypertension.
When the doctor first said bed rest, I was elated. My mind raced with all the things I hoped to get done before she arrived. There was the yard, and getting the nursery ready, and the house cleaned. Plus we were working mandatory over time at work, and since I managed a team I was working long days. I had to be there early and stay late to accomodate the times my employees could fit in their overtime hours.
My hopes were quickly dashed as the doctor informed me bed rest didn't just mean not going to work. It meant staying in bed, laying down, all day long. "I don't even want you to lift your laundry basket" he said.
I was so bored. SOOOOO Bored!
It wasn't really a big deal, because we had no other children, so I didn't really need any help that Mike could not provide.
However, you can only read so many books and watch so much TV. I read the first 4 Harry Potter books during those two months.
And the highlight of each week was the visit to the doctor's office for a stress test to evaluate the baby's well being and also try to determine how rapidly the placenta was deteriorating.
I was induced one week early because of the placenta and our beautiful baby girl arrived safe and sound!
Jansyn however, was a whole different experience.
We tried and tried and tried to get pregnant with no luck.
After 1 year, we endured all sorts of testing and procedures, including:
- tracking my cycle
- daily ovulation tests
- taking my temperature every morning
- We added things to our diets
- We eliminated things from our diets
- Blood tests
- Sperm test
- Postcoital test
- tubes flushed with dye to look for blockages
- laparoscopy to remove endometriosis
- Clomid
I am the oldest of 6 kids and Mike is the oldest of 5 kids.... neither one of us could imagine having only one child. Neither one of us could imagine being raised without siblings.
Our prayers were finally answered, and after three months of Clomid, we conceived Jansyn.
Over two years later, from when we first tried to get pregnant, she arrived healthy and happy!
Our quest for family has been a difficult one. After what it took to get Jansyn, we decided we would not make any effort to prevent pregnancy - we wanted a third child. So, over 7 years later, we have watched as multiple friends and family have conceived and given birth to 3 or 4 children in the time we have been trying to get pregnant.
I believe I have reached a point where I am at peace. I have observed families. Some are large, and others, like my own, are small. I have concluded there is no magic number to make a family.
I have stopped getting excited and buying baby clothes when my period is late. I can't say I have stopped hoping, but I can say I have decided to appreciate what I have.
I have been blessed with two healthy and happy daughters, and I am quickly realizing my time with them is short. I do not want to spend that time wishing for something I cannot have. I want to enjoy what I do have.
Our girls truly bring joy to our home and they make me smile everyday. I grateful for the opportunity God has given me to be a mom.
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